For years I hated sex. I grew up in a Christian family where religious guilt loomed over my sexual pleasure like a dark cloud. I felt awkward even thinking about masturbating, I felt awkward to talk about sex. Sex, to me, was "bad. It started when I lost my virginity at 20 to a guy who had no interest in being the "giver"-a term I didn't understand at the time, anyway. I had no idea what good sex was, and for nine years I dated men who weren't able to make me come. For me, sex was always a chore.
Three months in, I found myself enjoying sex again, making a playlist of songs that turned me on and was no longer hyper-aware of the sounds my curvy body was making.
Like the way my thighs clapped together or my tummy smacked his.
Six months in, I took off the cami I'd hidden my body inside of, not caring that my boobs plopped off into my armpits. For the first time, I was more concerned with every part of sex that felt good than finding a flattering angle to hide my stomach or back fat. My body was being enjoyed by the both of us, equally.
8/12/ 2) Somebody get fed up with Rudy's wisecracks and punt her through a wall and 3) Watch Denise have hard-core sex with Mickey Rourke while they're 29/7/ And finally, at 29 years old, I had my first orgasm. One thing's for sure, it's definitely not like the movies-for starters, it takes much longer than 30 seconds. Films give women and men 2/12/ "Masturbating doesn't always leave me satisfied and sometimes I'm more horny than when I began, but it does make me feel relieved from stress. I lie on my stomach in bed and watch
A year in, I stopped wearing clothes entirely. At least, I assume that is what my kids would say.
I stopped that primal run from the shower, and now lazily walked to the closet naked. I made school lunches in my underwear, and didn't reflexively pull away when Andy came up behind me and wrapped his arms around my waist.
My relationship with my husband, and my body, had changed in amazing ways. I totally don't have sex with my husband every day, not anymore.
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Not because we're sick of each other - although I'll admit, my pelvis and thighs welcomed the rest - but because we're humans, not robots. However, the effects and lessons from the experience are still apparent in our marriage even now.
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First, we learned that it's hard and that's normal. The majority of people around you are not having sex every single day. They're busy being stressed at work, coordinating their kids' soccer schedules and paying bills.
Fitting sex into all of that is difficult, but for us, it's necessary. Sex is what reminds us that we're intimate partners and not just roommates in charge of keeping kids alive.
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Second, we learned the exact amount of sex life we need to keep us happy in our marriage, and we're able to adjust our lives around that. I no longer freak out if two weeks pass and we forget to have sex, because we work to connect in other ways.
Intimacy doesn't always mean penetration. Sometimes it's making out on the couch like teenagers, sometimes it's Andy triple checking the DVR to make sure all my fall TV shows are set to record. We all get to decide what turns us on. The point is, the effort to show love to each other is there.
Lastly, I learned that I am a better wife, a better mother and a better woman when I take the time to be secure in my relationship and selfish about feeling good about myself. I am not the best version of myself when I am insecure and panicky. I'm basically a walking vague relationship Facebook post.
Because joy is really contagious, like the greeting cards say. Compersion is the opposite of jealousy.
Cuckoldry takes our deep shames and insecurities and then eroticizes them. Watching a partner with someone else, being present and orchestrating that humiliation themselves, is a way to take back power in a situation where they might otherwise feel powerless.
Psychological suffering can be immensely powerful. Desire starts in the mind, after all.
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Another reason some people find cuckoldry erotic is the competition factor. This more intense desire and bigger orgasms are evolutionary byproducts of cuckolding.
And then there is, of course, the psychological element of the forbidden. Taboos are hot.
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Breaking taboos is even hotter. Husbands are not supposed to enjoy watching their wives have sex with other men.
The space between vulnerability and fear is where the love happens. Follow Us:. Share Tweet Email.
Share: Share Tweet Email. SHREVPORT, Louisiana - Two people were arrested after a Louisiana woman allegedly had sexual intercourse with a dog.
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